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EUROVISION 2023: GERMANY - UNSER LIED FüR LIVERPOOL REVIEW


Germany, fresh from yet another last place at last year's Eurovision (Germany's placings the last ten years are 25th, 25th, 25th, 4th, 25th, 26th, 27th, 18th, 21st) is trying again to find the song through open submissions (548) and open TikTok wildcard submissions (900+) and this is what they came up.... And considering humor act Ikke won the wildcard I don't have much faith in Germans following the success of the other Big5 this year either....
The winner will be chosen 50/50 international jury/public vote.

Anica Russo  Once upon a dream **
Waltz pop that turns into screamy noisy thing. Why am I thinking Kylie Monogue's Wild roses? That was myserious and intrgiung, this is not. 
Frida Gold - Alle Frauen in mir sind müde ****
Withdrawn due illness :-(
This is the female answer to late Roger Cicero's women rule the world, now they are tired. 
This would probably be the best choice for Germany to try to succeed. A risk worth taking over humor acts and safe pop tunes. 
Ikke Hüftgold - Lied mit gutem Text *
No, just no. Is this Germany's Portion Boys? Send this if you think you deserve to be last again.
Lonely Spring - Misfit *
Is this supposed to be funny? It's not. Andorran Anonymous did this much better with better lyrics, too, and without trying to be clever fun with f words. Yawn. 
Lord of the Lost - Blood and glitter ***
This promised a lot in every sense but falls flat in the end. The look and genre aren't enough when the melody doesn't work for some reason.The shock value isn't there anymore, Eurovision has seen it all and this isn't anything new anymore. This said, this would be better than most German entries since forever. 
Patty Gurdy - Melodies of hope ***
This would have been so hot in the early 1990's for Maggie Reilly but it's 2023. Will it work? I suppose the live performance is crucial, will this come alive and work? I hope so. Easy listening that could appeal voting public in certain part´s continent.
Renè Miller - Concrete heart *
This is exactly a kid of song Germany ends sending; middle of the road safe song that ends up 25th in Liverpool being so average in every way it probably scores zero points placing below 11th in every country.... Not sure about his voice live, it could be better as here it sounds weird.
Trong - Dare to be different *
Germany's answer to Robin's entry in Finland I suppose. Just worse in every way. The lyrics are as cliche, this time only about daring and being different, I'm so over these themes. Another song that would end below 11th place in most everywhere and secure Germany in bottom-5.
Will Church - Hold on ****
First thought was Duncan Laurence. (Edit: I didn't know he had done Duncan in The Voice!) But that vanishes soon. There's something about this song I like, if performed well this might have a chance do pretty well, pull even a Schulte, this has appeal to sneak into top-10 here and there and actually get points. Maybe.


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